I recently read a post called Dear Mom: I Needed You. You Did Not Come. I feel like this post depicts a phenomena that’s increasing over time which deals with moms shaming themselves to be better moms. If they’re not shaming themselves, then they are allowing others to shame them.
When I read this post, at first I probably thought the sentimental meaning behind it was good but then as I kept reading, I realized that there’s a grander truth which is lacking in this post. As mothers, lest we never forget that we cannot be there all the time.
We can wish we were always going to be there. We can strive for helicopter mom mode and try our best to never miss a moment – one of those moments that if missed we’d never forgive ourselves. We can even feel disappointment and ‘shame’ when we aren’t there but the point of this is to help our kids understand that we will fail them at times.
We can’t be there all the time but Jesus can and is.
I know, our big nurturing hearts never want to disappoint our kids and be there for all the moments when they need us or when they want to spill their guts to us, but we just can’t. We are human beings, we fail. We also have loads of responsibility with our roles that need tended to as well. Our kids need to learn this too.
Rather than keep a tattered reminder of the moment when our kids called us out on our failures, I’d rather keep the memory of me explaining to them that I simply can’t be there all the time, no matter how badly I want to. Yet there is One whom they can always rely on without fail.
They’ll learn to trust Him and they’ll learn to forgive me — without the shaming reminders laying around.
Point Them to Jesus When They Focus on Our Failures as Parents
Here are some promises that you can help your kids memorize so that they are reminded of the One who doesn’t fail, who cannot fail, who is always faithful. This is a great exercise for open communication about our inability to live up to our own (and their) expectations.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” — Psalm 73:26
“It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” — Deuteronomy 31:8
“You shall not fear them, for it is the Lord your God who fights for you.’” — Deuteronomy 3:22
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” — Joshua 1:9
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” — Isaiah 41:10
“All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never cast out.” — John 6:37
“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” — Romans 8:28
“For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” — Romans 8:38-39
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” — 1 John 1:9
“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.” — 1 Peter 5:6-7
All of Psalm 136 is about how God’s love never fails!Allow them to be disappointed in you. Through that, they may learn the truth that you are human… Click To Tweet